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How to Completely Make a Pigsty Out of Your Kitchen in Five Easy Steps

Step 1

Go downstairs to clean your kitchen but instead get sidetracked by the mountain of laundry waiting for you on your laundry room floor (and other places too). After forgetting to clean because the laundry preempted the kitchen, make lunch for the hubby and feed him. Make sure you chatter incessantly to him while feeding him. After feeding hubby, go downstairs and pile his newly dirtied dishes next to the other piles of older dishes you didn't clean earlier.


Step 2

Now, go to your writing studio and check your emails for any new book reviews on your upcoming release...The Heartbreak of Time Travel...Nope, nothing. So, bag the idea of any new reviews today and, instead, shoot over to WorldofSolitaire.com and try like the dickens to win a hand (just one, for cryin' out loud) of Russian Solitaire. Sing I Left My Heart in San Francisco to Noble (your indoor pigeon). Then snack on some old chips you found in the cupboard of your writing studio.


Step 3

Take a nap.


Step 4

Wake alarmed that you ever fell asleep at all and, what is it now? One p.m.? Good gravy. Figure you've put in quite a big day already. So, take Joey for a walk at the airport walkway and talk to him the entire way about how tired you are and, in no way--do NOT clean up when he makes a runny poo. Sorry. But. No. Run like a wild woman after Joey poos because he always shoots off after poo-ing and then laugh and laugh and laugh that you're 66 years old and running the airport walkway like a wild woman after your dog--away, away, away from the runny poo.


Step 5

When you arrive home, avoid walking through the kitchen. In fact, put your hand up to your left eye so that you don't look at the kitchen at all. Tell yourself, "All the messes are best left for tomorrow because tomorrow looks much more promising for cleaning than the rest of today looks."

This is the best Bible verse on procrastination. The others are hell and damnation and, well, I think we need a little light in our worlds. Don't you?

Matthew 6:34: "Sufficient for the day is its own trouble"
 

This is the scripture before that leads up to and after Matt. 6:34


31 “Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For after all these things the Gentiles seek. For your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.


God bless you all!

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